HEATH — One year after Utica resident Lynette Ricketts was murdered by her ex-husband, Lynette’s mother, Nancy Jones, said the healing her family needs is beginning slowly.

According to authorities, on Oct. 19, 2008, 49-year-old Randy Ricketts, who did not have a criminal record of domestic violence, went to the home Lynette shared with her twin teenage boys and shot her before turning the gun on himself. The couple had divorced four months earlier, dissolving a 17-year marriage which Jones said was marked by turmoil and emotional abuse.

Although the murder-suicide stunned residents of the quiet Utica neighborhood where Lynette and her boys lived, Jones said she had feared for some time that Randy would harm her daughter.

“I told my son, ‘He’s going to hurt her,’” Jones recalled.

She said she believes Lynette did not share her mother’s fear regarding her safety and did not believe her life was in danger.

“I think she believed he would never take her away from the boys,” Jones said. “It cost Lynette her life.”

Jones said she believes Lynette, like other victims of spousal or partner abuse, underestimated her ex-husband’s capacity for violence. She hopes others living in dangerous situations will learn of Lynette’s story and take precautions to keep themselves safe.

“Go and talk to a domestic violence counselor, talk to your doctor; let them get you to the right people,” she said.

Jones said her daughter worked very hard at convincing those around her she was doing well, even when her relationship with her ex-husband was at its most difficult.

She said that although confronting a loved one you suspect is in an abusive relationship can be uncomfortable and difficult, the stakes are too high to allow for anything less than total honesty. She has blunt advice for anyone with a loved one they are concerned could be in an abusive relationship.

“Sit her down, talk to her — as many times as it takes,” she said. “Have your facts in order and ask the right questions: ‘Do you feel pressured to do things you don’t want to do? Are you afraid to disagree with him? Does he accuse you of affairs or become jealous of your friends? Does he make you feel wrong, stupid or guilty?”

Jones said speaking honestly with someone who could be in danger can save that person’s life, but will only be effective if the person you are trying to help is ready to look at their situation truthfully.

“Don’t just tell them what you’ve seen, but have them look inside their own heart,” said Jones.

Mary Hendrickson, director of New Directions: Domestic Abuse Shelter of Knox County, said professionals such as those who work for her shelter can offer practical help to those seeking assistance to leave an abusive relationship.

“We can go with them to court if they file domestic violence charges, and we have a shelter if someone needs a safe place to stay,” Hendrickson said.

New Directions has staff available by phone at all times to provide crisis assistance, or to lend an ear if someone needs to talk.

Jones said she knows Lynette’s friends, family and co-workers all supported her healing after the divorce, and many of them have struggled over the past year wondering how they could have prevented Lynette’s tragic death.

Lynette worked for seven years in the office of Licking County Prosecuting Attorney Ken Oswalt, where she had daily contact with police officers and prosecutors. Oswalt said Lynette never confided in him any fears about her safety.

He said in the months following Lynette’s murder, some of her work colleagues have struggled with the same second-guessing her family has expressed.

“The friends, the co-workers and those left behind are left second-guessing and asking ‘How did I not know?’ or ‘How did I not see?’” he said.

The impact of Lynette’s death has been felt by her close-knit family, her co-workers and her friends. Jones said Lynette and Randy’s twin sons, who are now living with a family member, are struggling with the loss of both parents.

“We’re able to talk about it now, and do a little bit of reminiscing,” Jones said.

She said her daughter enjoyed being a mom and adored her sons, and that Lynette was the kind of mother who never missed her sons’ sporting events, and always made her children’s friends welcome in her home.

“This has left such a void. It affects everyone, and especially her boys,” Jones said. “They miss their mother every day.”